The woman who runs Trattoria Al Sasset in Niguarda, Milan, where I eat lunch every Friday, is an excellent Italian teacher, as well as a great cook. Cleta is originally from Calabria, and her formal Italian is clear and direct. She corrects me without any judgment. Today she told me: sto sempre bene. And what is the secret to happiness, I asked? I used the word felicità for happiness. 

Felicità non esiste, she told me. It doesn’t exist. You should say instead, Qual’è il segreto di stare bene? To be well, she said. I realized when I left it wasn’t my vocabulary she was correcting. But I was very happy after her cima saltata.

***

The next time I was there for lunch, I mentioned to Cleta that I am in the market for a grembiule - an apron. She invited me into her kitchen and gave me a beautiful apron with red stitching. She wrapped in a plastic bag and told me to put it away quickly and not tell anyone about it. It was our little understanding. 

Ten minutes later, as I was eating my Friday pasta e fagioli, she came into the dining room with a different apron - she had found something more appropriate for a man, she told me, and wanted to give me that one instead. The first one, which I returned reluctantly, was meant for a woman, and it had her name on it. I was a little sad to return it because I liked it so much, but I will do anything she tells me. –E